Cookie jars and puzzle pieces

I am sitting in my new life, preparing for a presentation that I have been putting off for the past two months. But as the date of the presentation is looming near, far too quickly for comfort, I could not put it off any longer.

"In the agricultural industry, quality evaluation and grading are integral to post-harvest and pre-marketing processes. These processes function to elevate market value of products, as consumers are willing to pay higher prices for what they perceive as better quality...

Colour is one of the first sensory attributes perceived by consumers. It acts as an indication of other qualities such as freshness and sweetness, though there may not necessarily be a correlation...

In this study the non-destructive method of analysing colour, through machine vision, was applied. Machine vision analysis of colour was compared to human sensory panel evaluation of colour. The feasibility of machine vision in colour analysis was investigated through comparison with data collected from sensory evaluation by a trained panel..."

After many months of neglegance, and struggle with this love-hate relationship with my thesis, I can hardly believe I am pouring through these words again. After I completed my thesis, I could not even bare to think about it, let alone look at it. But reading through it now, I feel a sense of pride and a rush of nostalgia. I actually miss it - the people, the routine, the structured life of ploughing through to meet deadlines, the sense of 'we're in this together' as my colleagues and I work late into the night in that cold, chemical permeated, suffocating lab. It was my 'home' for those long nine months. Oh how much of my life I poured into it. Every single day of hard work was another day ticked off and a step closer to finishing. Cliched as it sounds, it was literally blood, sweat and tears, with plenty of liquid nitrogen, sweet smelling apples, colourful concoctions paving that ice cold road, warmed by friendships forged as we battled expectations and unexpected happenings. 2014 for me was indeed a series of unfortunate events. But through it all I have gained so much. It was a year to remember.

So many months have flown by and doing this timewalk into the past, the juxtaposition showed how much the scene of my life has changed and I along with it. The faces that were so familiar no longer feature as a regular character in my current life. New faces became regulars. I can't believe it was half a year ago that I had my hair cut short! I can now tie my hair up again. If you asked me to describe this new chapter, instead of the pressure cooker that it was last year, this year was more of a melting pot of chocolate ganache, Manuka honey, lemon cake, homemade distillates, learning Chinese medicine, treading the tightrope called family, regaining health and stuffing my hands into as many cookie jars as I physically and mentally can. A shambles, really. But I am figuring it out, slowly discovering which type of cookie I like the most and which type I am best at making. There are still plenty of cookies left to be tasted, which is extremely exciting! But I also have to remind myself not to be too greedy. I need to narrow down my selection and become and expert in making those cookies, rather than wander off into the donut stand or the brulee bar, as tempting as those are.

Each day I lay down a piece of puzzle, each day I am closer to revealing the bigger picture of my life. Maybe some days no puzzle pieces will be placed, and maybe after that long stretch of quiet I'll lay down a patch of puzzles. Who knows? It doesn't matter as long as I keep my head screwed on and focus ahead on my vision. As more puzzle pieces are laid down, the picture will become clearer. Be it marching ahead or taking a step back, it's all part of the process. Work hard, take it easy, go with the flow, go against the grain, do whatever I must do. Plan for the future, live in the present.

Pineapple Tarts

It feels surreal to be sitting here writing this post rather than researching for and writing my thesis. Everyone who's met me would've asked, how does it feel? Do you finally feel free? I think up until now, I don't particularly feel anything, having jumped straight from the thesis wagon to the work wagon without coming down for a stroll in between. If anything, I feel I have less time to spare. While doing my masters, I had a deadline and a big list of things to do. This meant that if I organised my time well and completed what I needed to do for each week early, then I'd have spare time for other things in life, like baking or ahem.. watching drama. Now, however, work takes up a big chunk of my time, and for the rest of the week, I've got activities packed into my schedule like books on a tight bookshelf. There's no room for a lie down in the sun (though.. what sun?) for a casual novel or magazine. 

That being said, this was what I wanted to do. It wasn't what I envisioned doing post-thesis, but I'm happy. I'm finally taking the time and putting in the effort to learn Traditional Chinese Medicine! There's a whole world of knowledge for me to learn and remember and I feel that there's no time to waste. Do you know that feeling when you're doing something that completely aligns with your beliefs and your core? This is how I feel now. Even though I'm at the infant stage and I don't know where I'll be or what I'm going to do with this knowledge in the future, or thinking more realistically, how am I going to build a career or get some income from it, it feels right. There's a voice in my head telling me, don't worry about the future, I'll naturally figure those issues out. Right now, just focus on building my library of knowledge. Everything has a natural order - growth, development, blossom, anthesis, fruiting. I should take this as my period of growth and development, put in the time and effort to water and fertilize, rather than worry about the flower and fruits that will come naturally when the timing and conditions are right. 

Anyway, pineapple tarts! Not to be confused with the Taiwanese pineapple cakes, these pineapple tarts are a must during Chinese New Year in Malaysia. We eat these by the bucket load and wherever you go during that time of year, you'll see these gold gleaming goodies lining the shelves of supermarkets or people's homes. They come in different shapes and sizes, the most common being ones where the pastry encases the pineapple filling, kind of like a miniature sausage roll. They are absolutely delicious. I mean, who can resist incredibly short, buttery pastry paired with sweet and tangy pineapples fragrant with cinnamon and other spices?

Of course, it's getting more and more difficult to get top quality pineapple tarts. The ones outside were probably made with the bare minimum of pineapple, boosted with some textural agent, and the pastry... you'd be lucky if you get ones that contain any trace of real butter. So, making your own pineapple tarts at home is the way to go! Sure, they'll take a bit of time, as all good things do, but they are seriously worth it. And it's for the new year, so you've got to spend some time preparing these golden fortune bringing cookies to bring good luck and wealth for the rest of the year. 

I know Chinese New Year is now over, but I'm thinking wayyy ahead here! You'll have a whole year to practice making these irresistible delights, because trust me, you'll want to make these throughout the year and not just for CNY because they are that good. 

Pineapple Tarts

For the filling:

1 pineapple

3/4 cups of sugar

1/2 tsp cinnamon powder

a few barks of cinnamon

1/4 tsp nutmeg

4 cloves

For the pastry:

250g butter, room temperature

60g sugar

2 egg yolks (save the egg whites for egg wash)

375g flour

1/4 tsp salt

2 tbsp cornstarch

1. To prepare the pineapple filling, first top and tail, then skin the pineapple. Cut the pineapple into cubes and then place in a blender and blend until it reaches a smoothie consistency. Transfer pineapple to a deep pot, bring to a boil, then reduce to simmer. Add in the spices and sugar and cook until most of the water has evaporated and you get a mixture that is roll-able (There should not be any more liquid bubbling in the mixture). Set aside to cool. 
2. For the pastry, beat together the butter and sugar until pale and creamy. Beat in the egg yolks until well combined. Sift in the flour, salt and cornstarch and mix until just combined. Place the pastry onto a sheet of cling film, roll out into approximately 0.7 cm and chill in the fridge until the pastry has hardened (about 30 minutes). 
3. Using your cookie cutter, cut out the shapes for your pineapple tart. Brush the pastry with the egg whites for egg wash. Take about 1/4 teaspoon of pineapple filling, roll between your palms into a ball and place on the pastry. Press down so the pastry sticks. 
4. Bake in a preheated to 180C oven for about 15 minutes or until golden. Cool on wire rack before serving. 

Almond Banana Chocolate (ABC) Cake

ABC... Easy as 1 2 3, simple as do re mi, A B C, 1 2 3 baby you and me girl!

Life is always better with chocolate. Life is even better with chocolate in the form of cake. Guilt free cake. Cake that is even healthy for you! Cake that doesn't make you break out if you're sensitive to sugar. Cake that you can eat for breakfast or lunch or midnight snack. Almond banana chocolate cake.

I don't know whether it's because I haven't eaten any sweet food in a while, but this cake really hits the spot. This delicious cake was made for my mum's birthday. I swear I was going to eat just one piece. Nek minnit... Ended up waking up in the middle of night three nights in a row chowing down this cake. Yes I still have self control not to eat the whole cake so it lasted a few days. And what surprised me was the taste of the cake matured over time. On the first night it was actually a bit too dry and you can't really taste any other flavours but chocolate. But second night, the cake miraculously became super moist and you can really get the banana and almond coming through the chocolate with the underlying tone of spices. One thing to add to it if i make this again though is fresh raspberries in the cake itself.

Almond Banana Chocolate (ABC) Cake

Recipe adapted from Green Kitchen Stories

Cake

200 g wholewheat flour

25g unsweetened cocoa powder

1 tsp baking powder

1/2 tsp salt

1/2 cup of desiccated coconut

2 eggs

80 ml olive oil

120 ml honey 

2 ripe bananas, mashed

1. Preheat oven to 180C. Butter a cake tin, then dust with cocoa powder. 
2. Sift together the flour, cocoa, baking powder and salt. Fold in the desiccated coconut. Set aside. 
3. Beat the eggs until nice and fluffy, then stream in the oil and beat until thick. Add in honey and beat until well combined. Mix in the bananas and mix until just combined. 
4. Add the flour mixture to the wet mix in three batches and mix until just combined. Pour the batter into the prepared cake tin. 
5. Bake for approximately half an hour (though check whether your cake is done as all ovens are different. The original recipe called for a 45 minute bake.)
6. Remove cake from oven. Let it cool in the tin for ten minutes, then turn it out onto a wire rack to cool completely. 

Ganache

80g dark chocolate

4 tbsp cream

1 tsp vanilla essence

Desiccated coconut

Freeze-dried raspberry

1. Finely chop the dark chocolate and transfer to a clean bowl. 
2. Gently heat up the cream until it's just under boiling. Pour over the dark chocolate. Add in the vanilla essence and stir until chocolate has melted and is completely smooth. 
3. Pour over the cake once it has cooled slightly (so it has thickened up but is still pourable). 
4. Decorate with desiccated coconut and freeze-dried raspberry. 

Cinnamon, Hazelnut and Chocolate Swirl Bread

Now, I really should be writing my thesis. But after week after week of labouring in front of my computer, abusing my eyes by staring at the screen from morning till night, and gaining weight from sitting and eating all day long, I thought I should pick myself up and work on something else for a change.

I've said it many times, but I love love love bread making! I think all bread-makers do. There is just something that's so magical and captivating about the whole process. If I had to choose between baking a cake and making bread, I'd choose bread any day. I am still nothing but an amateur though, learning by reading (only onto Chapter 2 in Flour Water Salt Yeast by Ken Forkish but I'm learning so much already!), watching (Paul Hollywood. Such a legend in the bread world. I love watching how he handles the dough with such confidence and care) and practicing. Slowly, I'm observing how small changes in the breadmaking factors can alter the structure and taste of it. (Can you tell I've been reading a lot of scientific literature?)

Two weeks ago I made Jamie Oliver's Sexy Swedish Buns. It came out alright. Everyone loved it. The flavours were bang on but I found the bread a bit too dry and dense for my liking. Then reading Ken Forkish, he mentioned that his doughs are highly saturated with water, which will facilitate the development of a softer bread. Makes sense. Also his breads are slowly fermented, starting off not by using warm water/liquid which so many modern recipes call for, but that of room temperature. The reasoning behind this is that slow ferments, as Paul Hollywood also mentioned, allows for the development of a richer and much more aromatic bread. Yeast and bacteria work together in this gentle process, releasing much esters, acids and other flavour compounds that would not have been produced at a higher temperature. Microbiology. Amazing.

In Michael Pollan's book Cooked, he discussed the symbiotic relationship between man and microbes. We rely so heavily on these microorganisms that we can't even see (90% of the cells in our bodies are bacterial cells!). In bread-making in particular, the yeasts break down the carbohydrates into components that are more easily digested. This only happens when they are allowed sufficient time in the fermentation process. The conventional 2-hour rise just doesn't cut it. Pollan also theorised that perhaps that is why so many of us develop gluten intolerances these days. The bread that we are eating nowadays have not been given enough time for the carbohydrates to be 'pre-digested' by the Saccharomyces. Our bodies have to work a lot harder in the digestion of bread and some people lack the enzymes for it.

So I tried the recipe again. This time adding more water and butter to the dough. All ingredients are at room temperature. Mixing the dough is pretty much impossible because of how wet it is. But I know the importance of developing that gluten to give strength to the bread. So I kneaded the super sticky dough for about 10 minutes. Because it was an enriched dough (it has egg and butter in it), it was almost like a brioche dough. And then I gave the dough lots of time to rise. It's such a hot summer day and ideally I should leave the dough overnight in the refrigerator for maximum development of flavour, but I wasn't THAT patient. I'll try that next time though.

After about three hours, I went to check on the dough. It has tripled in size and the gluten network is so much more developed compared to my first attempt of that recipe. I know it will turn out incredibly soft. After spreading, filling and shaping the dough, I gave it more time to redevelop that beautiful network structure. That structure is what makes the bread super soft and fluffy. So all in all it took about 6 hours to make the bread. That's a lot of time (though not as long as Ken Forkish's breads). But I only worked on the dough for 25 minutes. The rest of the time, it's all the yeast's and the bacteria's work.

The bread turned out incredibly moist, soft and fluffy. I'm so excited! This is only the beginning of my bread journey. I sincerely ask you to hop on my bandwagon. Twenty minutes worth of work and this is what you get. It's definitely much much better than any supermarket bread. It's so delicious and more importantly it doesn't contain any of the rubbish additives that those so-called breads contain. It tastes even more amazing knowing that you've nurtured it and brought it to life. And seriously, there's nothing better than the smell of bread and your family and friends would be so happy if you share it with them!

Cinnamon, Hazelnut and Chocolate Swirl Bread

For the bread:

350 g high grade flour

50 g wholewheat flour

80 g raw sugar, blended

1 tsp cinnamon

1/2 tsp cardamom 

Pinch of nutmeg

1 1/2 tsp yeast 

180 ml soy milk (or any milk you have on hand)

70 ml water

50 g melted butter

1 egg

1 tsp salt

For the filling:

3 tbsp cinnamon

1 cup chopped hazelnuts 

20 g chopped dark chocolate 

For the decoration:

Raw sugar

Melted chocolate

1. Stir together all the dry ingredients. Set aside. 

2. Stir together all the wet ingredients. Stir the wet ingredients into the dry ingredients. I find using a butter knife is the easiest and most efficient. You can use a stand mixer with a dough hook attachment if you wish. Knead for about 10 minutes until the dough is smoother. It will still be incredibly wet and won't really hold its own shape. 

3. Oil a large bowl, place the dough inside and cover with cling film. Leave at room temperature to proof until it has tripled in size. This will take about 3 hours on a warm day. 

4. Knock down by punching the dough. Tip the dough out onto an oiled surface and spread the dough into a rectangle using your hands. Oil your hands to make the process easier. 

5. Sprinkle the filling on evenly. Roll the dough up like a log and shape into desired shape. Place on lined baking tray.

6. Leave to proof a second time for about 1 and a half hours. Remember to cover with cling film. Then preheat your oven to 200C. Place a bowl of water in your oven to create steam. This will allow for a more even bake. 

7. Once your oven is preheated, sprinkle raw sugar on the dough then place in the oven to bake for about 12-15 minutes until golden.

8. Remove from oven. Look underneath your bread to check whether your bread is done. It should be nice and golden. When you tap your bread, it should sound hollow. 

9. Cool on wire rack. In the mean time, melt some chocolate over a water bath. Drizzle onto your bread. 

10. Serve.

Tips:

1. Take your time with making bread. Use room temperature ingredients. A good pointer from Ken Forkish is treat time and temperature as ingredients. Long time at low temperature is what you're aiming for. 

2. It's important to use high grade flour, which contains larger amounts of gluten that will give you a really soft and fluffy bread. For this bread, I used 00 flour. 

2. Place a bowl of water in your oven to create steam. Remember to use a heat-proof bowl. Steam will create an even temperature environment so your bread will bake more evenly. Also, it will slow down the baking of the surface of the bread, allowing your bread to rise more. 

Kimcheese Roll

Kimchi. Cheese. Kimchiiii. Cheeeeese. Kimchiii cheeese. Kimcheeeese. Kimcheese rolls. Kimcheese bread rolls. Rolling kimchi and cheese up in fluffy bread rolls. Kimcheese bread rolls. 

Today's recipe is a savoury one. It is comforting, warm, salty, spicy, cheesy all rolled up in chewy bread. You can eat it as a complete meal. It's got all you need - carbs from the bread, fibre, vitamins and nutrients from the veg, minerals from the seaweed, good source of fat from the sesame seeds and protein from the cheese. You can eat it as an accompaniment to other dishes. You can eat it as a snack for tea time! 

The idea of this dish was born from the craving of salty food. Having tried making bread rolls with kale and cheese, I thought I'd delve deeper and explore other territories of incorporating vegetables in bread. I decided to play on the fusion concept.  In Korean cuisine, cheese is sometimes used. Spicy kimchi noodle soup with cheese on top? Cheese tteokbokki? It's non-traditional, but the spicy, savoury, refreshing taste of kimchi goes really well with the hearty flavours of cheese. Both have satisfying umami flavours, imparted by the glutamate molecules which humans have a huge attraction to. So, why not bring them together in a fluffy bread roll? 

While I am neither skilled nor in possession of time (presently) for making the traditional nappa cabbage kimchi, I decided to adapt kimchi flavours in making this quick, non-fermented 'kimchi'. Asian cooking is all about the balance in flavours - layers of spiciness from the Korean chilli flakes, fresh chilli, ginger and onion, saltiness from salt, soy sauce and nori, sweetness from tomato and a sprinkle of sugar, tanginess from tomato, all of these lifted by the nuttiness of sesame oil. The vegetables are all sliced finely into roughly the same sizes, bathed in hot brine to extract moisture and develop crunch, then tossed in the spicy sauce. Let me tell you, it was so mouthwatering and I had to refrain myself from eating straight from the pot. Had to remind myself to save some for the bread!

The 'kimchi' itself was so yummy. Just imagine it laced with melted cheese. Then all this caressed by that warm, chewy, fluffy bread. Irresistible!

Kimcheese Rolls

Makes 12 rolls 

For the bread: 

3 cups of strong flour

2 cups whole grain/mixed grain flour 

1 tbsp salt 

2/3 cup rolled oats

1/3 cup corn grits

2 cups water (luke warm)

1 tbsp yeast 

1/3 cup olive oil

1 tbsp maple syrup 

For the kimchi:

1 leaf of cabbage

1 leaf of kale

1/4 carrot

1 apple
1 sheet of nori
3 tbsp toasted sesame seeds

For the spicy sauce:

1 small chilli

4 tbsp Korean chilli flakes

1/4 shallot 

1/2 tomato 

1cm ginger 

1 tbsp raw sugar

salt and soy sauce to taste 

1 tbsp sesame oil 

100g Colby (or similar) cheese

1. For the bread, mix all the dry ingredients together until well incorporated. Stir together water, yeast, olive oil and maple syrup and add to the dry ingredients. Start off by mixing with a butter knife until the dough starts coming together. Then tip the contents onto a clean bench and knead until dough is elastic and smooth (about 10-15 minutes). Place the dough in a large oiled bowl, cover with a damp cloth or plastic wrap and let it proof for about 1-2 hours until double in size. 
2. In the meantime, prepare the spicy sauce. Finely chop all the raw ingredients for the spicy sauce. With a mortar and pestle or a blender, pound or blend all the ingredients the chilli, chili flakes, shallot, tomato and ginger until a paste forms. Transfer to a small saucepan, add in the sugar, salt and soy sauce and cook until fragrant (a few minutes). Turn the heat off. 
3. Bring a pot of water to boil. Meanwhile, finely chop your vegetables for the kimchi. Once the water has boiled, turn the heat off and add a tablespoon of salt. Stir until salt has dissolved. Place the vegetables in the brine and leave for about 10-15 minutes. Drain. 
4. Dress the vegetables with the sauce. Add in the finely chopped apple, torn up sheet of nori and sesame seeds. Stir until combined. 
5. Knock down the bread, then briefly knead the dough, folding it in on itself so the smooth side is exposed. Roll the dough out into a rectangle, about less than 1cm thick. Pile on and evenly spread the kimchi (you won't use all of it). Then grate the 3/4 of the cheese onto the dough. Tightly roll up the dough, making sure the filling is all sealed in. Divide into 12 pieces and place on a line baking tray. Let the dough proof a second time until double in size (about 45 minutes). 
6. Half an hour into the second proofing, preheat the oven to 180C. Once the dough is ready, top with the remaining 1/4 of cheese and bake for about 20 minutes or until nice and golden. 
7. Remove from oven, and cool slightly on a wire rack before serving with some of the kimchi. 

Non-bake Granola Bars

I have reached a milestone! I feel like I am on holiday now. I FINALLY finished the lab component of my thesis!!!! No more late nights and weekends in the poorly ventilated lab. No more standing for hours and hours on end, endlessly pounding apples and getting frostbites and weird brain freezes from liquid nitrogen. No more sniffing acetone and methanol. No more skipping meals because experiments take so long. No more!!!

Though oddly enough, as much as I disliked doing lab work, I feel like I will definitely miss walking around in my lab coat and safety glasses between levels 5, 1 and 7 of the Chemistry building. As much as I hated handling chemicals, I felt that through the past few months, I have actually come to terms with it, and I admit, towards the end, I actually quite enjoyed it. This could possibly be because the last experiments I was doing produced really awesome samples (Check out my Instagram). My pigments extractions actually looked really pretty! The vibrant green chlorophylls from Granny Smith peel, pastel yellow from Envy flesh and bright pink anthocyanins from Royal Gala are definitely eye-catching.

I feel like I've learned a lot from doing experiments. Not only the laboratory skills, I've also learned how to work with others. When I first started doing lab work, I think I was pretty selfish and self-centred. All I really cared about was that I had so much to do and I wanted to get everything done as soon as possible. But in real life, it doesn't really work that way. The lab isn't just for me. I had to work with lab technicians and peers, make compromises in terms of when to use the machines, sharing equipments and things like that. Certain times when I had to work at other people's lab, it was all on their schedule. Time management and planning became a huge part, especially when I had to plan my way around the few limited days that I could do the analyses and before my analyses I had to do so many lots of eight-hour-long extractions. And sometimes when you've spent days extracting your samples and they don't turn out good, that really tested your patience and persistence.

But I have to say, that few months, though exhausted as heck (and naturally, grumpy as ****), looking back now I wouldn't have done it any other way. There were times when I felt extremely lonely and questioning, when I was by myself desperately doing my work in the late hours on a Sunday night. Or that poignant moment when I bought dinner in between experiments and considered sitting down in the restaurant as a table for one. What was the point in working so hard? Why do I come in weekend after weekend, rejecting invites for late night BBQs or Mario Kart parties? But then I reminded myself, it will all be worth it when I FINALLY FINISH. When I finally start writing and start seeing my thesis slowly come together piece by piece. But gosh, seeing how hard everybody works, I can't complain at all. And friendships really are forged, when you drag your sleep deprived bodies into lab together, or when you share stories of how you accidentally pissed off the lab technician again, or when you just randomly rant about boys or admire girls with good genes that have time to go to gym and have super toned sexy legs. No, I wouldn't have had it any other way.

Though all these weeks I worked tirelessly, pushing myself to the brink of exhaustion, literally sometimes feeling like I could just keel over in between grinding apples, possibly knocking over that flask of liquid nitrogen, spilling it on my already dead hands, there was something else that I learned. That was to trust my intuitions. When that voice in your head says 'go home, don't start that experiment', you go home. Because chances are, you will screw up 50% of the things, you will make the stupidest mistakes and end up having to repeat again. Your instincts know best.

While doing my lab work, I more often than not ended up bingeing on sugary stuff which I convinced myself was good for the soul, despite my body sending out all these clear signals to STOP. Now that lab is over, I feel like a detox is definitely called for. I made these nut and oats bar as an inspiration from the lab I was tutoring and also to help me transition into a no-sugar lifestyle. And oh my gosh, these are SO GOOD!!! I should, but I actually can't stop eating them. They are so addictive. You won't believe that there's no refined sugar or anything added. The nuts provide the delicious crunch. All the natural ingredients - coconut, honey, olive oil, peanut butter, cocoa nib, they really do instill soo much flavour into the bar. And they are so so easy to throw together too! You don't even have to turn your oven on. They make a really nutritious snack and if you're like me, eat it for breakfast too. Definitely give it a go!

Non-Bake Granola Bars

Recipe inspired by Eat Well NZ

Makes 18 bars

Dried ingredients: *

3/4 cup rolled oats

1/2 cup red rice flour (or regular white rice flour)

1/3 cup pumpkin seeds

1/3 cup desiccated coconut

1/3 cup sunflower seeds

1/3 cup raisins 

1/4 cup walnuts, broken into smaller pieces

2 tbsp cocoa nibs

1 tsp cinnamon 

1/2 tsp Himalayan or sea salt 

 Wet ingredients:

1/4 cup extra virgin olive oil

1/4 cup honey

1/4 cup peanut butter

1 tbsp maple syrup 

1. Stir together all the dried ingredients. 

2. In a non-stick pan, dry toast the dried ingredients on medium heat until fragrant. Make sure to stir constantly. This is to lightly toast the nuts and to cook the rolled oats and rice flour. Also, the cocoa nibs, coconut and seeds will release their oils that will be instilled into the whole bar. Set aside. 

3. In a saucepan, stir together all the wet ingredients on low heat until melted and well incorporated. This will only take about a minute or two. 

4. Pour the wet ingredients over the dry ingredients and mix well. 

5. Line a 9x9cm square tin with baking paper. Press your nut and oat mixture into the tin firmly, using your hands to make it level. 

6. Refrigerate your bars overnight or for 4 hours. 

7. Cut into 18 bars (3 x 6). 

8. Serve. 

*You can choose to use other nuts and seeds, anything that you happen to have on hand!

Red Bean Pumpkin Rolls

On my birthday, one of my best friends wrote me a card and in it there were two quotes. The first quote was a Dr. Seuss one, which can be applied to any kinds of situation. "Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened". The second however, spoke to me on a deeper level. It was originally Japanese, translated to Chinese - '今后我想在自己选择的道路上一步一步的寻找光明。直到我能这样微笑着说话为止，在哪之前我至少要流下一公升的眼泪', from the Japanese Drama One Litre of Tears, which was based on a real life story of a young girl named Aya who kept a journal while her body wore away from spinocerebellar degeneration.
"From today onwards I wish to march on the path that I myself chose, step by step in search of light. Until I can genuinely smile while I speak, I must shed at least 1 litre of tears".
We must constantly strive for happiness, for equilibrium and balance, in this ever changing world. And that is what I will leave you with today, alongside these photos and recipe.

I tried several variations of the pumpkin bread, making both savoury and sweet versions. In the end I think I prefer the red bean version the best! I also tried several versions of dough, the original recipe called for milk added to the mixture. It made the dough really soft and harder to handle (dough in the round bowl), so I omitted it and added more pumpkin instead (dough in the square-ish bowl).

In terms of flavour, you can't really taste much of the pumpkin. It just lends a subtle sweetness and gives the bread a stunning bright colour!

Red Bean Pumpkin Rolls

Makes 12 

Recipe adapted from Sally's Baking Addiction 

For the dough:

160g pumpkin, chopped into cubes (leaving the skin on is fine)

2 tbsp oil

1 tsp salt 

2 tbsp sugar

1 tsp ground cinnamon 

1/2 tsp nutmeg

1/2 tsp ground cloves

1 tsp five spice 

1 egg, beaten 

2 tsp dried yeast

2 1/2 cups all purpose flour 

For the filling:

Red bean paste 

1. Place the pumpkin into a pot of boiling water and let it simmer until softened (about 15 minutes). Test with a fork. 

2. Drain the pumpkin, then mash with a fork. 

3. Add the oil, salt, sugar and spices and mix until well combined. 

4. Add in the egg and mix well.  

5. Add the yeast and flour and stir until combined. Tip mixture onto a floured surface and knead with floured hands. You will need to knead until the dough becomes smooth, feels elastic, doesn't stick to your hands and springs back when pressed with a finger. Treat the dough gently, but firmly. 

Alternatively, knead with a mixer with the dough hook attachment, but this takes the fun of making bread away!

6. Oil a big bowl and the surface of the dough, then place the dough in the bowl, covered with plastic wrap or damp cloth. Let the dough proof for about 1.5 to 2 hours or until it has doubled in size. 

7. Knock down by punching the dough to deflate it. Knead the dough, folding the rough side in so the smooth surface is on the outside. Shape and roll the dough out on a lightly floured surface into a rectangular shape. 

8. Spread your desired amount of red bean paste onto the dough, then roll up like a swiss roll. Divide this log into 12. 

9. Place each dough into a muffin hole, cover with damp cloth and let it proof a second time for about 1 hour or until dough has doubled in size again. At the 45 minute mark, turn on the oven to 180C to preheat. 

10. Glaze the rolls with a light layer of egg white then bake for about 20 minutes or until golden. You'll know the bread is done when you tap the bottom of the roll and it sounds hollow. 

11. Remove from pan and cool on wire rack.